Now, if you’re like me, or any other American, you love Amazon. The option to have something delivered to your house in two days at a reasonable price without having to actually interact with someone is super appealing. That being said, on the surface I would think buying something to look directly into the sun is probably not a product you should buy on a whim without researching or something you should skimp on the price. Being blind isn’t worth saving a couple bucks or 10 minutes looking to see if these things are legit. You can do that with a $20 skillet from Amazon because it will take 40 years for that Teflon cancer to kill you and who cares about 70 year old me anyways? But not your eyes.

Also if you’ve ever been in school, ever, you know these Eclipse Glasses aren’t exactly high quality to begin with. Spending any denomination on them is frankly stupid. I’m pretty sure you can go to any library and get them for free. In fact, here’s a map of participating libraries:

2017 total solar eclipse free sunglasses libraries united states aas

Unless you live in Nevada, you’re probably set,  and their retinas are probably already burned to shit anyways with all the lights on the Vegas strip, that or seeing all those cheap hookers’ cooters. I guess people have come to rely on Amazon so much that they have forgotten that libraries even existed, so maybe those people do deserve to be blind for being so fucking lazy, but maybe they’re right, I’d rather be blind than be called a nerd…

Amazon is crediting back the value of the unverified glasses though I’m not really sure why. Sure you could say blind customers could hurt the reputation of Amazon, but I say blind customers need Amazon more than ever. A blind person can’t drive to the store. A blind person can’t window shop. Do you know what a blind person needs? A service that can deliver everything directly to their door, and with the acquisition of Whole Foods, Amazon fills that need in spades. You may say, but how will they use Amazon? they literally cannot see. I say, although the cost may be higher, send anyone blinded by these glasses free Amazon Echos and you’ve got a shut in customer for life!

I will admit I love the story I found about a guy who ‘invested’ $4,000 (all his disposable income) in these unverified glasses and hoped to flip them on Amazon for a quick buck but now they’ve banned his sale of them. How many pairs of these does 4,000 fucking dollars buy? Can you even dump that many in a landfill? I think they would be mad. The man said if he had to throw them away he couldn’t pay his rent, and if true, I don’t understand why he wouldn’t just stand on a street corner hocking them like a normal crazy person selling cheap and unnecessary shit. Like the good old days.

I also don’t really understand the fascination and effort to see an eclipse to begin with, or the anger over possibly not being to see it. Do you want to see a Solar Eclipse?

Image result for solar eclipse

Boom. Done. Google image search. Problem solved.

Ps. I also saw online some people planning to use the 3D glasses from the movies. I just want to say if you do, you deserve what’s coming to you.

The Naysh


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